[From Dr. Franklin’s Staticy Cat]
A pretty long time ago, there were two kids named Handsome and Pretzel – YES, Handsome and Pretzel – and they lived with their parents on the edge of a scary, terrible forest. Handsome was a boy, and he really was (handsome, that is). Though Pretzel, his sister, wasn’t anywhere near as good-looking, she did have silky, blonde hair that was exactly 45 feet long. If she threw it out her bedroom window, which was on the third floor, it reached all the way to the ground. No, I’m not thinking of someone else.
Handsome and Pretzel, of course, lived with their mother and father, though their mother was actually their stepmother, which means that she just stepped into their house one day and wouldn’t leave. This stepmother – her name was Andrea – hated Handsome and Pretzel’s guts. She was especially…
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