Some years ago, I was a Creative Columnist for the acclaimed Canadian magazine The Walrus. I wrote over two dozen short stories for them, including reader favorite “Camp Faraway for Bitter Young Men.” If you didn’t catch that story the first time around, have a look:
If you enjoyed the story and would like to see more of my fiction on their site, kindly let the editors know by writing to letters@thewalrus.ca. I’d be so grateful 🙂
Until next time, friends.
Cheers – – –
Rolli
P.S. You might like my latest collection, Plumstuff.
Today, HOAX Magazine published one of my short short stories, “Legs,” on their website. I also provided the illustration. Have a look when you get a chance:
I was close to throwing up when I noticed an enormous glowing sign that said BOOKSTORE.
I sat up.
I stood up.
I brushed the leaves off my back.
*
There were a few people inside the store. I felt a little better. As long as several members of the species read, there’s still hope for us.
The rows and rows of tables at the front of the store were strewn with candles. A beautiful girl was sniffing a blue candle. She sniffed it for about a minute. Then moved on to a yellow one.
In the middle of the store was a ring of six tall bookcases. There were no books on them. I noticed bathrobes … telescopes … letter-openers… An elderly woman grabbed one of each, and dropped them in her basket.
The bookshelves on the back wall were cluttered with stuffed animals. And bubble bath.
In the corner of my eye I spotted a bearded man on a stepladder constructing a pyramid of green tea cans.
“Excuse me,” I said.
He dropped another can in place.
“You’re going to laugh,” I said. “But I can’t seem to find the books.”
The man didn’t laugh.
He blinked.
“Books?” he said.
“Books,” I said.
He blinked again.
He squinted.
He smoothed his beard.
“I don’t think…”
He smoothed his beard.
“No…”
“I don’t think we have those.”
I looked at him for about a minute.
“Are you sure?” I said.
He looked at the ceiling.
He smoothed his beard.
“I can take a look,” he said.
He climbed down the ladder and vanished.
I wandered around…
Pen sets … headphones … coconut oil…
My heart almost stopped when I saw a book but it was made of chocolate.
The elderly woman walked by. She was standing on a slant. Her basket was heaped with bubble bath bottles.
The bearded man reappeared.
“No,” he said.
He stared at me for at least a minute.
“No … books?” I said.
He shook his head.
His beard was unbelievably smooth.
“Thank-you,” I said, eventually.
The man blinked.
He blinked again.
“No problem,” he said.
He climbed back up the ladder. And added a capstone to the pyramid.
I backed away. I felt dizzy. I leaned on a bookshelf.
A herd of stuffed elephants fell to the floor.
On my way to the door, I bumped into someone.
“I’m sorry,” I said.
It was the beautiful girl. She didn’t say anything. She resumed smelling a red candle.
I staggered outside.
I collapsed in the grass.
I threw up.
This story was first published in SYLVIA Magazine.
Just letting you know that my latest story for children, “One Gum Bubble,” has been published in Short Circuit. You can read it here – and find it in short story dispensers the world over.
My latest children’s poem, as well, was just published in Orbit. Peruse it below.
That’s all for now. I have lots of other stuff to share with you in the September issue of my free monthly newsletter. If you haven’t subscribed yet, you can do so right here.
If you like any or all of the above, you’ll definitely want to sign up for my free, monthly newsletter. Keep up-to-date on my latest publications, peruse previously unpublished material and take exclusive sneak peeks at works-in-progress. WARNING: newsletter may contain secrets, giveaways, and other fun stuff.